With Valentine’s Day fast approaching, I’ve been thinking a lot about love. The funny thing about my thought process is that recently I was a guest on the Charlotte Magazine podcast #DiscussCLT to talk about love and dating in Charlotte. Far from an expert on love and dating, I was invited on because of an article I wrote for the November issue.
Even before this month, or the podcast came up, it felt like I couldn’t escape the word or the topic of love. In the past few months, I have been asked numerous times about my feelings about love. Does it exist? Do I believe in it? Do I want to fall in love again? Out of all the questions I was asked, the one that got me was about whether or not I wanted love in my life.
Even after a divorce and some breakups since, I have never once thought that I didn’t have love in my life. I have an awesome family, incredible friends, a fluffy and lovable dog, and I have my faith. I won’t lie to you and tell you have I haven’t had moments where I’ve wondered what the hell I’m doing in the romantic relationships department. There have been many times when I’ve thrown up my hands and said “I’m done,” but those declarations only lasted for a dramatic southern moment.
While my track record with love has had some hits and misses I don’t blame love for any of my bumps in the road. Love doesn’t hurt us, it’s people, situations, timing, etc. that hurt us. Over the past few years I have learned that love is more than just love between spouses or partners. To me the greatest love is love of self. If you can’t love yourself, how will you ever be able to truly love someone else?
Reading a book, listening to a record, cuddling with my fluffy and lovable dog on my green couch, and just being OK by myself and with myself is sometimes enough. And even though I happen to like myself, that doesn’t mean there’s not room for one more on my green couch.
So for all of the questions I’ve been asked about love, the answer is always yes.